Lovable Inferno

I hated you because the reflection I saw in your eyes was too perfect to be me, why couldn’t they reflect a mirror?

The looks you gave me, dressed in awe and expectations and love, scared me away: why couldn’t they be more earthly, more pessimistic, more realistic, more me.

It is pure hate and love of ego: I hate who it is so much that I choose to protect it from those who love it for I see no hope.

I think of you as pathetic, weak and needy; but your biggest strength is the weakness I wanted to be confident enough to unmask: vulnerability.

And so life flies on, carrying us through storms of unease, and when your too-good-to-be-true self crawls into my thoughts I close my eyes and wonder what could have been.

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